A fairy tale

Once upon a time I went to Earthcore. Sure, you went to a dance festival, but why start with that lame introduction I hear you ask? Well, a hippie once told me that if you're ever staring at a blank page, unsure what to write, then start with 'Once upon a time'. You can erase that bit later, but it will kickstart your brain into gear. Well, I've adopted the technique and as you can see it worked. I also adopted that hippie's stance on global whale sanctuaries, but I digress..

A sidenote before I get in too deep, this is the first post of my first blog, and I'm giving a shoutout to ManicLovely for her righteous blog and inspiring me to do this. Go check it out sometime - that's an order soldiers.

Well, a bunch of us headed up to Underra for Earthcore 2006. The early bird gets the worm (apparently) and when the year's sun was still a new-born babe we got our fleshy pink loam-eater for only $85. 'Too late too late,' will be the cry, when the Early Bird tickets have passed you by. Upon arriving, a very speedy looking rent-a-cop type was eyeing the inside of our vehicle. 'Brought any alcohol or drugs with you?' he questioned. We answered in the negative and he grinned 'Well, you better go back and get some then.' Yep, this was going to be some event :) Setting up camp was relatively uneventful, if you discount the blood, sweat and firetrucks (we had all three). Our source of shade was a massive tarp precariously suspended at waist height. If we weren't crawling from the drugs we would be by necessity. We came and went like lizards, literally, according to one acid tripper *cough* Svet *cough*.

Experienced Earthcore goers will tell you Friday is the 'quiet' night. I'm not sure where this comes from, as there is nothing quiet about Earthcore full stop. A mate and I took a trip that afternoon and went exploring. His kicked in a little faster than mine, and from then on, became the embodiment of the Oracle. Everything he was seeing was a divination of a future I was headed for. He wore an ear-to-ear smile, known simply as 'the Grin' and I soon joined him in his merriment.

We headed out to an open field to check out the pumping PsyTrance coming from a British double-decker bus. The wind was restless and blowing strongly. The two of us laid on our backs literally sticking to the ground. We mused how the world was really upside down and we were clinging to the roof. Another friends mushrooms had kicked in and she proceeded to ski on the spot, her wind-swept hair reminiscent of a 70's cigarette commercial. By this stage I was off my chops and got up for a hardcore acid-inspired crazy dance. If there were a field of naked women in front of me I wouldn't have known, so true did I stay to that moment.

Unfortunately, I was later informed a professional camera crew also stayed true, and decided to film my antics. Skid marks were understandable (weren't they?) at the thought my tripped out self headlining a TodayTonight story on LCD and how it's destroying the youth of today!


Eventually we collected our many thoughts and consciounesses and decided to find our camp again for supplies. Unfortunately, when there are 3000 tents setup in a chaotic and random way, finding a single one in the pitch black of night can prove a challenge. We were knee-deep in scrub and and hopelessly lost before we realised this fact. The acid had turned sour, and I thought we were all going to be part of the next Blair Witch Movie.

What made Friday unforgettable was the thunderstorm. While the laser light shows were keeping the croud reasonably entertained in the outdoor stages, once DJ Mother Nature lit up the skies with fork lightning, every x-head and speed freak couldnt help but lift they're arms in praise to the phat thunder beats she laid down. Some were happy to sing and dance in the monsoon that followed, while paranoid acid victims huddled under Boost Juice tents that were under siege from the deluge. No prizes for guessing which group I was part of (hey I just happened to feel like a 'Berry Bang with Antioxidant suppliments'... ok ok, I'm soft)

If the first night was a slap in the face to the uninitiated, Saturday was to be a mighty Chuck Norris roundhouse kick to the head. While the day was moderately uneventful (consisted of watching hotties go up and down on mini-motorbikes, chasing down more acid and floating a shrink wrapped Joint across the river on a inflatable cushion) the night was pure bedlam.

The one thing everyone at Earthcore overdoses on is stimuli. There is just so much happening every where you turn. Like kids in a candy shop everyone just beelines for what attracts them at that moment, and as such, keeping a big group together is nigh impossible. Market stalls, yoga lessons, fire twirling, poi demonstrations, street-art, music stages in the form of circus tents, massive beatboxes, the Coliseum and a big dragon head that threatened to engulf everybody. Literally, that stage looked like a massive schizophrenic Luna Park head. Before the great split up however we all started the evening with a jumping castle adventure. Casting aside the repressive containers some call shoes we bounded onto that spacey terrain like Neil Armstrong on meth. Bouncing off the walls and each other, our heart rate quickly went through the roof. After a recovery session we all went our seperate ways and madness truly began..



What makes Earthcore so great? The characters you meet. Everyone on the whole is friendly as, and you'll meet so many cool people (most of which you wont get contact details from, because they've met so many people, who met people, etc..) but its the real eccentric ones that you'll talk about when all is said and done. Warstomping warrior princesses, guys in mirror-ball suits (which light up like kryptonite personified when hit with lasers), dancing bears, stilt walkers, unshaven women serving soy-based beverages, and smoothie store operators that used to be acrobats for the french circus in the 70's (complete with star spangled jump suits - and photos to prove it).

In the middle of the market stall area, there was a small clump of trees. As we approached, a particular rough looking hippie fell out of a hammock that had been there since the dawn of time. Dazed and confused, he stumbled around wondering where half his pants had gone. We summised that he had actually been on a particularly harsh trip at Earthcore 2004, and been there ever since. This year they had just setup around him. What a wake up call that would have been. The previously mentioned Warrior Princess was going around painting randoms with her warpaint early Sunday morning. I can only assume it was created in some sort of sexual ritual and was marking the chosen ones. When questioned about her actions, she had a puzzled look on her face as if she'd never heard of a stupider question - 'It's the last day..' she put simply. Of course, the last day - why else would you splatter lesbian love goo on complete strangers.

If you are looking for some of the grooviest tunes this summer, try to track down a list of set times from EC 2005 and anything at the Market Stage will rock your world. No matter what was playing at the other stages, upon returning to this hallowed ground we were hit with phat funky pornstar beats - and it was appropriately dubbed by us as 'Ol Faithful - a mark of respect (yes, labelling some of the worlds best DJ's as a dirty natural spring in the U.S. is respect.. somehow).

I remember distinctly thinking as I spied a token-security guard, and felt the incredible energy that was flowing throughout thousands of souls (thats not energy Stu, its MDMA...) that this place was out of control. There was no turning back, and no-one could stop this event right now if they tried. Not the president, not the army, not even the Nursing Mothers Association. All there was to do was get real trashy and shout (all together now people) 'Earrrrthcawww! Yeah!'

At some point in the night, my new found friends were feeling the upside of acid. The paranoia, the feeling of iminent death, all that good stuff. I nursed a male back from the brink as he lay on the ground shaking. 'I've got clarity!' he'd exclaim sitting up. 5 minutes later he'd be back on the ground musing quietly 'The monsters are coming..'. Its ok Seb, we still love you.

Reports this year will tell you Earthcore this year was one of the best. It was my first experience but it definately exceeded expecatations. Various improvements had been made, such as wet sand dance floors, which prevented the mass 'dust-ups' that had occurred in previous years - great for dancing bare foot. The weather was also amicable, forgoing the oppresive 38 degree heat of last year for comfortable high 20's. The organisers did a great job and I'll take this opportunity to thank all who attended - see you next year bitches!