Mouse with some cheese - you know how I feel

Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin, Sammy Davis Jnr - these were the giants of yesteryear. Male crooners that could tease and seduce an audience with their smooth lyrics and caramel tones. They enjoyed the admiration of men and adoration of women everywhere. Their memories will be with us always...

Enter Michael Buble (hereafter referred to as Bubble). I found this picture of our favourite singer on GayMatchMaker.com - look out boys. Now we all know said giants left a great repetoire of songs that could be covered. No-one seems to have made much of an effort until now. Do I support such a notion? Of course - everyone has a right to sow seeds into the over-populated bacterial world that is the music industry. But when using such great material, caution should be taken when trying to go out on your own and record an original 'classic'.

I dont know what how many paint fumes Bubble sniffed as a child, but these lyrics are some of the most uninspiring collection of 'learning-to-read' samples I've ever read.

Fish in the sea
You know how I feel
River running free
You know how I feel

Stars when you shine
You know how I feel
Scent of the pine
You know how I feel

Scent of the pine, wtf?! I'm sorry Bubble, but the scent of pine needles dont actually know your innermost feelings at this moment. Call me crazy, but I just doubt the ability of carbon-based plants to conduct accurate psychological evaluations. Writing songs aint easy I know, but being the golden child that I am, I have re-written the song. If your reading this Bubble, you may use this material - god knows you'll steal it anyways.

Gum when you're chewed
You know how I feel
Scent of the shoe
You know how I feel

Hive full of bees
You know how I feel
Mouse with some cheese
You know how I feel

Its a new dawn, Its a new day
Its a new life, For me,
And I'm feeling lame

You actually like Bubble Boy? Hehe, post a comment so I can pity you.